LOVE IN THE FAMILY

The ideal family set up is that of a Father, Mother and the children, all under the coverage of God almighty and biblical principles. ‘And if it seems evil to you to serve the Lord , choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve… But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD .”’ Joshua 24:15

It is not news that there are lots of deviation from this ideal family set up, all in the name of civilization. In the beginning it was not so.

‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.’ Gen2:24

‘And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting;’ Rom1:28

Activity 1

Discuss various family settings that exist in our world today. Depending on how matured your children are, mention family settings that do not follow the biblical pattern. The aim of this activity is to establish God’s position regarding marital union as exemplified in Adam and Eve.

One of the most important virtue a family must have is LOVE. Without love, it is practically impossible for a family to exist and fulfill the purpose of God. Love originates from God, and God expects us to manifest love starting from the home and spreading out to the world around us.

God’s kind of love is not just a feeling, it is an action, it is something you are deliberate about.

‘Little children (believers, dear ones), let us not love [merely in theory] with word or with tongue [giving lip service to compassion], but in action and in truth [in practice and in sincerity, because practical acts of love are more than words]. ‘1John3:18Amp

Activity 2

How should I show love to members of my family?

Love has many channels of expression, and the major aim of today’s bible time is to understand the different expressions of love expected biblically from every member of your family, and endeavor to deliberately express them. As we look into these, you will understand how dad, mum, husband, wife or children uniquely express or should express God kind of love.

GOD

God is love. He shows His love in diverse ways. ‘He who does not love does not know God, for God is love. ‘ I John 4:8

HUSBANDS/FATHERS

Husbands, love your wives [seek the highest good for her and surround her with a caring, unselfish love], just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify the church, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word [of God], so that [in turn] He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy [set apart for God] and blameless. Even so husbands should and are morally obligated to love their own wives as [being in a sense] their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own body, but [instead] he nourishes and protects and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, Eph5:25-29 Amp

‘However, each man among you [without exception] is to love his wife as his very own self [with behavior worthy of respect and esteem, always seeking the best for her with an attitude of lovingkindness], Ephesians 5:33aAmp

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to the point of resentment with demands that are trivial or unreasonable or humiliating or abusive; nor by showing favoritism or indifference to any of them], but bring them up [tenderly, with lovingkindness] in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4Amp

‘For those whom the Lord loves He corrects, Even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights. Proverbs 3:12Amp

We can see that God expects more from husbands and fathers regarding the practicality of love in the family, the scriptures above can be summarized in the following words: Sacrifice, Protection, Guidance/correction, Provision, Affection. These are the ways men are admonished to communicate love in the family.

WIVES/MOTHERS

…and the wife [must see to it] that she respects and delights in her husband [that she notices him and prefers him and treats him with loving concern, treasuring him, honoring him, and holding him dear]. Ephesians 5:33b Amp

The heart of her husband trusts in her [with secure confidence], And he will have no lack of gain. She comforts, encourages, and does him only good and not evil All the days of her life. Proverbs 31:11-12

She looks well to how things go in her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed (happy, prosperous, to be admired) Prov31:27-28a

Women are natural lovers, tenderhearted and affectionate, it is easy for the demonstration of their love to be easily noticed. Their demonstration of love can be summarized as: Respect, Nurturing and  Help.

CHILDREN

Children, obey your parents in the Lord [that is, accept their guidance and discipline as His representatives], for this is right [for obedience teaches wisdom and self-discipline]. Honor [esteem, value as precious] your father and your mother [and be respectful to them]—this is the first commandment with a promise… Eph6:1-2 Amp

And this is love: that we walk in accordance with His commandments and are guided continually by His precepts. This is the commandment, just as you have heard from the beginning, that you should [always] walk in love. 2John1:6 Amp

Children, you also have a part to play in establishing love in the family. You are to ensure that you appreciate the love received from your parents by reciprocating the act of love. The bible encourages us to do this by obeying and honoring our parents.

If we all play our part in showing love in the family, then others will see God in us and they will be attracted to us, and we can easily direct them to the God Himself through the love of Christ.

Reflection:

-Do I recognize and appreciate the love expressed by other members of my family?

-Am I playing my part?

-What are the areas I need to improve on?

Take turns to highlight areas that need improvement in a loving manner, not judging anyone.

Family circle: Father, we thank you for your word and for helping us to see what we need to do to express love as commanded by God, starting from our home. Help us to work on the areas that need improvement in our family.

#Love

#me and my family